such is life

have you ever just woke up and thought to yourself, “what am i doing?” I know its a very vague question, but it applies to any and everything. Right now, i am 2 months away from graduating with a degree (kinesiology) that i don’t know what i will do with, and on top of that i don’t even like it anymore. So i can’t help but sit here and wonder what if… Do i regret anything in my past? Sure. Anyone who says no to that question is clearly lying. I hate it when people say you should never regret anything in your past. But i think life is about regrets. Its about taking chances and making mistakes.

It’s funny but as i get older i become less and less certain about life. When i was younger i was so sure i knew what i wanted to do, how life would be, and all that jazz. But now, finally seeing things without my ruby glasses on i see what life really is. Uncertain, sometimes scary, and never easy. Maybe my new found views are partly due to seeing my parents not as the ‘amazingly wonderful parents’ that most of us grow up believing. But instead as the ‘full of mistakes, wow mom i didn’t know you were an alcoholic with a severe gambling problem’ type of parents. Such is life, as my father would say. Such is life indeed.

there is so many things running through my mind right now, i cant focus on just one right now. ill sleep on everything and see what i got left in the morning